How to Hijack Your Own Influence during Q&A

By Connie Dieken | Published: July 29, 2009

You’ve been leading a high priority mission for months.  You’ve pushed. Prodded. You’ve influenced internally because you believe it’s the most vital issue facing your organization. Your team has invested sweat equity and they’re counting on you to make it happen publicly.

At last, it’s time to present your idea to an audience and influence others to take action.  So what happens when you finally stand before your audience and take your swing at bat?

You get hijacked during Q&A.

obama-health-presser-2It happened to the President of the United States on his home turf last week. At the end of his prime time health care news conference, Barack Obama answered a hot button question that was totally off-topic.  Instead of asking about health care, a reporter asked the president what he thought of the confrontation between Harvard scholar Henry Louis Gates and Cambridge police officer James Crowley. The president weighed in with his opinion on race relations, ending with the tantalizing words “acted stupidly.”

Bingo! Home run for the reporter! She’d successfully hijacked a presidential press conference. If this was a game of chess, she’d just pulled a capture: removing the opponent’s piece or pawn from the board by taking it with one’s own. The president’s health care headline was toast. Now, the headlines were commandeered to scream of the 3 P’s: the president, the professor and the police.

This is a living, breathing reminder to all of us to be mindful of Q&A so that our message doesn’t become part of an opportunistic takeover – friendly or hostile.

Here are a few tips to help ensure that you don’t hijack your own influence during Q&A:

  • Don’t answer too quickly. If the question is off-topic and hot button, don’t allow yourself to be hijacked.  Gently but firmly respond that the question is important but it’s off-topic and will be best addressed during a more appropriate occasion. Offer a specific time when you will provide a thoughtful answer.  The key is that you shouldn’t appear to be dodging the question. You’re simply deferring it to a more appropriate time and place.
  • Keep your answer brief. The more you talk, the more likely you are to get caught up in your underwear and say something you’ll regret. Long answers often lead to an unfortunate choice of words (think “acted stupidly”) that can bite you in the backside. Talk less, but say more.
  • Bridge back to your key points.  The purpose of your presentation is to influence your audience and drive them to action.  Never forget that.  Use the audience’s questions to reinforce your key points, not to steer the boat in a completely different direction.
  • Don’t let Q&A be the final word. Always have two closings.  1) The one that ends your prepared remarks before Q&A, and 2) the one that wraps everything up after Q&A.  End with power and a strength of conviction that your message is high priority and actionable.
  • Plan for hot topic tie-ins. You shouldn’t be surprised in today’s “anything goes” society.  Think current events.  What’s on people’s minds? Prepare, prepare, prepare.

As a communication coach, I guide senior executives in their high-profile presentations. As the day of their presentation draws near, I shift our focus from delivery of their key messages to preparation for high stakes Q&A.   I ask every  relevant question that I believe their audience might ask to ensure that the executive is influential in driving the ball forward, not backwards. Then, I slip on my broadcaster’s  cap and link their topic to other hot-button topics. This is an eye-opening exercise for executives who tell me it  has saved them from embarrassment, being at a loss for words, saying something they’d later regret, and a loss of leadership influence. It boosts their confidence to handle anything that comes their way.

My inner Girl Scout constantly whispers the motto “Be prepared” in my ear.  Never has that been more essential than in today’s loosey-goosey world of Q&A.

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The Less is More Lesson

By Connie Dieken | Published: June 27, 2009

mark-sanfordYou heard about the married politician caught trysting with his girlfriend in Argentina. On the day he was caught returning from his fun in the sun, South Carolina Governor Mark Sanford held a hasty, free association press conference at the statehouse to drop the bomb.

Three words for you, Governor Sanford:  Less is more.

His rambling admission of guilt was devastatingly wordy and bizarre.  He dithered on about his love of hiking.  He blathered about “sparking” with his “dear, dear friend” in Buenos Aires.  At last, he meandered into a confession.  After finally admitting to philandering, the governor presented his priorities wrong.  He tearfully apologized for hurting his girlfriend before he expressed regret that his shameful behavior had damaged his wife and sons, and that he’d done the citizens of South Carolina wrong during his six-day disappearing act.

The governor showed us how not to meet the press.

As a leader, Sanford’s wordy discourse was far too long and misdirected.  He needed to talk less and say more.

I hope you’ll never experience a moment of truth quite like this one in your career.  However, as a leader you will be called upon to influence the thoughts and actions of others.  Here are a few tips to help you influence intentionally:

  • Don’t confuse talking with influencing. Most leaders think influence means showing up and giving a speech.  They want to look good, sound intelligent, and come across as well as possible.  However, the real goal of  influence is to move people to commit to action. That means touching hearts and minds, not merely talking your way out of (or into) something.
  • Don’t shoot for a quick fix. It’s not the short game that matters – it’s the long game. The Governor will learn this over the coming months as he’s judged by his constituents, citizens and family.  A hastily arranged  press conference (or meeting) solves nothing.  When attendees are caught off guard,  they can’t fully process the information you dump on them, which means that you’ve merely delayed the final outcome.
  • Move people in the direction you desire. Communicate with purpose.  Not just because you believe that a communication of some sorts is called for.  The Governor was too quick on the trigger to address the media.  His goal should have been to get the story out of the news, not to get tongues wagging and create even more drama.
  • Cut the distractions. Did you see the young faces behind the governor as he spoke?  They were smiling broadly as he choked up.  How weird.  Be aware of your surroundings during leadership communications – or make sure that someone else is watching out for you.
  • Keep it brief and simple. The key to communication in the 21st century is brevity.  Attention spans are collapsing. Demands on time are increasing. Master the complex business of simplicity. If you blather on, you risk losing people’s attention…and their respect.

Sanford’s Wall Street wife was far more succinct.  Her statements to the press have been pithy, if  a bit understandably passive-aggressive. So far, she’s winning the oh-so-polite war of words for public support.

Leadership communication is about aligning people to influence their thoughts and actions. I encourage you to be purposeful about communicating with influence.  Take time to distill your message instead of being long-winded.  In today’s world, saying less is truly more.

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Jon & Kate Plus….You.

By Connie Dieken | Published: May 27, 2009

Nearly 10 million people tuned in for a record-shattering season premiere of Jon & Kate Plus 8 this week. I’ll tie this to you in the workplace in a moment — I promise there’s a business communication connection.  The tension was palpable as the bickering couple, caught up in the cheating chatter, came together for their sextuplets’ fifth birthday party.

We’re talking frozen tundra frosty. Ultra-chilly. These two were so cold, the cameras needed de-icing.

jon-kateJon and Kate scooched as far apart on the couch as possible, closed off to each other, sending undeniable signals that they’re miserable and their relationship is on the rocks.

Despite trying to play nice for the cameras, their body language revealed that they’re merely doing what they have to do to earn a paycheck.  “Kate and I are going through some stuff,” said a glum-looking Jon. You think?

That’s where YOU come in. Are you going through some stuff in the workplace?  Is there someone  who gets under your skin and, despite your best intentions to hide your true feelings,  your irritation or loathing is showing more than you want it to?

Your body talk sends messages that people decode.  They size you up in seconds and draw conclusions about whether you’re credible, likable, or trustworthy. Despite the words you choose, people are first influenced by “hearing” your body language.  Before they’ll believe your words, they must first buy into your body talk.

Here are a few body language tips from my upcoming Talk Less, Say More book to help you come across at your best:

  • Fight the urge to close yourself off. Your instinct is to move away from a person whom you secretly despise.  Fight it. It won’t be a secret if you point your body in the opposite direction.  Remind yourself to unlock your arms, look at them with as much warmth as you can muster, and conquer your desire to ice, ice baby.
  • Avoid Code Red.  Discover what specific situations or people trigger an elevated state of anxiety or anger and learn to manage your behavior during these situations.  You can’t control the other person’s actions, so focus on managing your own. Don’t damage your career by being the person who’s known for giving someone else the cold shoulder or for crumbling under pressure. Don’t just cope with the situation. Own it.
  • Keep it real. Gestures and movements are most effective when they’re a natural extension of the feelings you’re trying to express. But they will undercut your message it if they come across as forced, fake or harsh.  Match your movements to the intensity you want to project and they’ll work to your advantage.
  • Conquer your mannerisms. Unlike gestures that you do intentionally, mannerisms are the unconscious movements that you make, often in anxious situations – like touching your nose, twirling your hair or scratching your neck. Ask someone you trust to reveal your habitual mannerisms so you can be aware of them and control them when you’re dealing with difficult people.
  • Don’t stifle positive gestures. Some people mistakenly believe they talk with their hands too much.  That’s rare.  If your arm movements distract from your words, then yes, they can be too much.  But most gestures are heartfelt and congruent with your words so therefore, they help to improve your energy level. (Just don’t gesture with a one-finger salute, of course!)

We can’t love everyone we work with, so uncomfortable situations are bound to happen to you, either with co-workers or clients. Hopefully, there won’t be TV cameras recording your every move for ten million people to judge.  But in this age of Twitter, cell phones that videotape, and YouTube, you never know who’ll be tuned in next….

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Is Your Voice Undermining Your Success?

By Connie Dieken | Published: April 29, 2009

The difference between winning and losing may come down to how people perceive the sound of your voice.

voice-over-pictureAs a broadcaster, I spent many years in recording studios.  I was astounded to learn there was a major difference between how my voice sounded inside my head…and the way it sounded when the engineer played back the recording.  I didn’t come across nearly as energetic or upbeat as my voice sounded in my head.  Instead, I sounded flat and bored. I had to learn to boost my energy level to compensate.

The same is likely true of your voice.  You may be coming across as bored, disinterested, stiff or icy – even when you don’t intend to.  Why is this critical?  Because it has a direct impact on how others respond to you and your leadership.

Let’s take your outgoing voice mail message as a quick barometer.  Ever listen to it?  Most of us think the recording is distorted and doesn’t sound like us.  We assume we sound much better in real life.

Sadly, we’re dead wrong.

Today’s digital doesn’t lie.  The recording is far more accurate than the voice you hear inside your head.  That’s because you have a distorted perception of how you sound. Why? Your head acts as an echo chamber.  Your bones reverberate when you talk, so your voice sounds bigger, louder and more energetic inside your head than it does when it mixes with oxygen and others hear it.

Worried that you aren’t coming across well?  Here are a few tips to help you stop repelling and start attracting with your voice:

  • Use vocal variety. Don’t hypnotize or lull people to sleep by speaking in the same continuous tone.  Sameness is the death of any  speaker.  Switch it up.  Use all the range in your voice – highs, lows, and mid-tones.
  • Shift the speed. Speed is another energy indicator.  A constant rhythm is a sedative to the ears.  Don’t drone on at the same pace.  Shift between faster and slower speeds.
  • Use shorter sentences. Some people sound boring because every sentence they speak is long.  Toss in shorter sentences as often as you can.  You’ll be amazed at how this breaks the monotony and makes people sit up and take notice.
  • Use the “Power Pause.” After you make an important point, let it breathe.  Don’t rush to fill the silence.  People are intrigued by momentary silence, so throw in what I call the “Power Pause” when you need to command attention.  Let a point sink in and you’ll gain power.
  • Thin is not in. Your voice is shaped by breath support.  Breathing too shallowly and speaking from the throat creates a thin, weak voice.  Instead, breathe deeply from your diaphragm.  Go to the gut.  It can make your voice sound richer, more powerful, and a full register lower.
  • Check your intensity. Sometimes you need to tone it down and not come on too strong – especially if you’re delivering bad or unwelcome news.  Match your energy level to the specific situation.

Energy boosts likability, which is a key ingredient to generate commitment from others.  Likability forms the framework for the rest of the signals people gather about you and the ideas that you communicate.

So improve your voice – and you’ll improve your ability to influence and make things happen.

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Credibility Smackdown

By Connie Dieken | Published: March 19, 2009

jim_cramer_2You’re a smart person.  The axe is falling on leaders everywhere and you want to come across as valuable and indispensable, right? Here’s a quick cautionary tale to bullet-proof your credibility, straight from your TV.

Time for a how-not-to-do-it lesson from Jim Cramer, the host of CNBC’s Mad Money.

Did you see Cramer get smacked down by Jon Stewart on The Daily Show this month? The normally effusive Cramer transformed into a whipping boy, seriously undermining his credibility.  After the smoke cleared, Cramer blamed his wimpy performance on his upbringing, saying he was raised “to take the high road.”

Jim, Jim, Jim. Think again. You allowed yourself to be mugged.

In today’s world, taking “the high road” means protecting your credibility (your brand) as well as that of your organization in a smart, thoughtful manner.  A successful appearance either: A) enhances the brand, or B) protects the brand. If your integrity is being attacked, you must protect yourself or risk being roadkill. Let’s review where Cramer went wrong so you can avoid the same fate, whether you’re meeting the media or taking Q&A at a meeting:

Daily Show Jim Cramer

Cramer agreed to a TV interview clearly billed as a “confrontation.” A duel.  In that context, Stewart’s performance was dead-on.  Cramer’s was dead-on-arrival.

A smackdown scenario could happen to you with an adversary, known or otherwise, in today’s one-up, know-it-all world.  Here are two things you should not do:

  1. Don’t underestimate your opponent. Cramer pegged Jon Stewart as a late night comedian. A panty-weight opponent. Wrong.  Jon Stewart is an ultra-smart, uber-influential man with a forum to express his viewpoints, for which he’s very passionate. Advice: Know thine enemy. Better to overestimate their savvy than underestimate it.
  2. Don’t think you can just “wing it.” For a prognosticator, Cramer was spectacularly short-sighted. Lack of preparation against an opponent is a death wish in today’s connected world.   Cramer didn’t do his homework – he had no key messages. Thus, he had no influence. Stewart was locked and loaded: Cramer was shell-shocked. Advice: Be prepared to defend your point of view – deeply, clearly and influentially.  Don’t allow yourself to be blind-sided and thrown off your game.

Wasn’t it amazing how Cramer groveled and went down in flames? The same thing could happen to you if you’re not prepared. Plenty of leaders are getting skewered – and damaged – by today’s empowered, informed audiences.

Bottom line – when profitability is on the line, you cannot “wing it” anymore. The best-prepared leader wins.

Take this to the bank:  Poor preparation leads to poor outcomes, especially in a tough economic climate. Don’t become a casualty.

As a communication coach for leaders, I should send Jim Cramer a thank you card for painfully demonstrating my point.

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The 10 Worst E-Mail Habits: Send & Sensibility

By Connie Dieken | Published: February 25, 2009

email-sign1Let’s say you get 100 e-mails a day.  (Everybody wants to “keep you in the loop.”) Do you realize how much of your time that’s eating up?  At 3 minutes a piece, it takes you 5 hours to read and respond.  5 solid hours! No wonder you’re having trouble getting things done – you’re stuck in e-mail jail.

Ready to tame this time-sucker?  It’s time to practice better word of mouse.

Starting today, let people know that you’re adopting a new policy to help everyone lighten the load.  You’ll gradually train others to stop overloading you with e-mails.  But it starts with you.  The better you send, the better you receive.

Here are the 10 Worst E-Mail Mistakes and how to correct them before sending your next e-mail:

  1. Using email as your automatic weapon. Don’t impulsively tap away just because e-mail is your favorite method.  Pick up the phone or -gasp- actually talk face-to-face with someone again.  This can speed things up considerably for both of you. Also, don’t assume that people have read what you sent them 3 hours ago.  If you’re sending time-sensitive or critical information, use the dual format: follow your e-mail with a brief, heads-up confirmation call.
  2. Wimpy or lazy subject lines. Use the subject line to briefly summarize important content.  Make it meaningful and timely to the recipient because most of us scan the subject lines in order to decide whether we’ll open, forward or trash incoming messages.  Don’t leave the subject line blank or write wimpy, generic subjects like “FYI,” “The File You Requested,” or “Project Update.” Be more specific and actionable.  And don’t be lazy and keep replying with the same subject line.  Refresh your subject line as the subject changes.
  3. Burying the lead. It’s rude to force someone to wade through 2 screens of information before you get to the action that you’re requesting.  If you want to get things done, say so in the first paragraph. Frontload your e-mail with what matters most.  Think newspaper headline.  Lead with what’s new and what you want the reader to absorb and act upon.
  4. Long-winded messages. Try to whittle your e-mail down to one screen or less because most people don’t read past the first page. Plus, we often hit “reply” before we finish reading the whole thing, anyway. If you have several items to convey, create a list.  Number or bullet your points so they jump off the screen and are easy for the reader’s brain to process.  Be as pithy as possible.  Brevity leads to quicker, better responses.
  5. Habitual High Priority! flagging. We all know the story of the boy who cried wolf, don’t we? Overusing the High Priority! flag makes you that boy. Just because it’s important to you does not make it important to the recipient.  Think fire drill. The flag means that information is time-sensitive and needs action straight way. It’s not a status symbol or power play.  Don’t use it to convey “The boss’s name is in here, so open it now!” or “We have a new employee!”
  6. Tone deafness. E-mail is a magnet for misunderstandings.  Sometimes we send words that unintentionally rub others the wrong way, depending upon your current frame of mind – or theirs. When people misread your tone, “You’ve got mail!” can morph into “You’ve got trouble!” Gut check your e-mails: how would I interpret this if it landed in my in-box? Also, refrain from sending or responding to emotional e-mails in the workplace.  Sending an e-mail is like sending a postcard.  If you wouldn’t want it pinned to the bulletin board, don’t send it.
  7. Copying too many people. Copying lots of people habitually is a heinous crime.  Ask yourself: “Why am I sending this to each recipient?” Let people know at the start of the message specifically what they should do with it. Do they need to make a decision? Is action required? Or is it just for awareness? If it’s just to cover your butt, don’t send the copy.  As for BCC, (blind carbon copy) its purpose is to protect individuals’ e-mail addresses when sending bulk messages, not to send stealth, sneaky copies. As for “Reply All,” it’s usually an oops! mistake. Rarely do you need to reply to everyone unless you enjoy grandstanding or power trips.
  8. Grammar and misspellings. Reading from a screen is more difficult than reading from paper.  Use standard capitalization and spelling. don’t use all lower case – it signals laziness. DON’T USE ALL CAPS – IT LOOKS LIKE YOU’RE SHOUTING! Make your e-mail personal by adding a greeting at the top.  Skip lines between paragraphs. (White space is good.) And always proofread.  If an e-mail is really important, print a copy to proof it.  You’ll often catch mistakes on paper that you didn’t notice on the screen.
  9. Forwarding without editing. Don’t just forward e-mails intact if the recipient didn’t intend for their thoughts to be passed along. Do a little triage to make it appropriate for the recipient.  Edit out any personal comments that could get the original sender in trouble.
  10. Sending unwanted attachments. Your goal is to reduce the number of steps that your recipient must take in order to act upon your message, right? Then don’t bog them down. When possible, copy and paste the most relevant passages into the body of the e-mail. Besides, you can bring down an entire e-mail system with a file that’s too large or virus-laden, and some systems automatically remove attachments, anyway.

Finally, a bonus habit since you made it this far.  (Promise you won’t hyperventilate at this suggestion?) Stop checking your e-mail obsessively. Turn off the “auto-check” feature that pings every few minutes, and limit yourself to checking e-mail a few times a day.  (BlackBerry readers excluded.) You’ll give yourself breathing room to focus and get things done again.

It’s time to stop letting the tail way the dog.  Grab control of your send & receive habits and you’ll write your own chapter of Send & Sensibility.

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Conquer Criticism: Tips to Overcome It

By Connie Dieken | Published: January 27, 2009

fear-of-criticismWe’re living in a harsh, harsh world.  I’m sure you’ve noticed that you can now get a daily dose of cheap shots here on the Internet. Follow the comment section after most web entries and you’ll find boatloads of hyper-critical, snarky comments.  Turn on your TV and there it is again – the Simon Cowell effect – people openly judging and grading others harshly. Ouch.

As I’ve coached high-powered clients recently, I’ve been struck by a recurring, performance-draining concern that leaders share with me (and one I’ve faced, too) that craters confidence: fear of criticism. The fear that you won’t measure up to expectations and will be judged severely as a result.

Fear of criticism is like kryptonite to a leader.

It’s a powerful deterrent that drains your confidence and power. Sometimes your biggest critic is your own inner voice.  Sometimes it’s others’ ruthless opinions. Either way, it leads to one of three depleting communication styles:

  1. Holding back instead of contributing, in order to avoid having your ideas criticized
  2. Being overly-defensive when well-meaning people offer useful suggestions, or
  3. Playing it too safe by communicating a boring, vanilla version of your ideas instead of aiming for outstanding.

Most leaders tell me their fear of criticism pre-dates the Internet. Some trace it back to childhood, when they experienced excessive criticism  that stuck in their heads like a broken record. Others say they witnessed tongue-lashings in the workplace and fear receiving the same fate, which causes them to lack confidence and reduce risks.

As an executive communication coach, I’ve learned there’s no connection between competence and confidence.  Even the most capable leaders can be crippled by the secret fear of criticism. Here are a few tips to help you overcome it:

  • Forget perfection, think excellence. High performers often strive for flawless, which means aiming for the impossible.  Think excellence, instead, to get over that self-limiting hurdle.  Give yourself permission to be your best at this moment, not the best of all time.
  • Switch your focus from internal to external. You don’t want to hear this, but ego is involved.  Often, a fear of criticism reveals that you’re too concerned with what others think of you. Turn it around. Manage your thoughts to concentrate on meeting your receiver’s needs, not on how they may be sizing you up.
  • Don’t be an avoider. Criticism doesn’t have to actually occur to cause anxiety or injury.  Perhaps that critical voice in your head is carrying too much weight.  Learn to face your fears.  Starting today, create a positive inner daily dialogue to overrule and replace your hypercritical self-talk.
  • Keep the criticizer’s goal in mind. Some bosses, clients and others may offer criticism because they want to help you perform at the top of your game.  Their feedback may be intended solely to improve your performance, not to take a personal shot. Perhaps they’re sharing the wisdom of lessons learned.
  • Resist the temptation to become defensive. Do you jump in and cut off criticism with knee-jerk reactions? If so, you may escalate the situation.  Tough critics can grow more determined to zap you again next time.  And in these cases, there will be a next time. Stay open-minded.
  • Ask for clarification. One of the best aproaches to handle criticism is to listen carefully, let the person finish, and then ask for specific clarifications. That way, you hear their full point of view  and stand the best chance to correct what’s may need to be fixed.

Learning to conquer criticism gracefully is a sign of leadership and maturity. It communicates respect – both for yourself and the others who share their viewpoints.

Just don’t fall into the trap of doling out cruel criticisms youself.  Shallow criticism without direction is a useless power play.

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Are You a Communicator-in-Chief?

By Connie Dieken | Published: January 18, 2009

george-bush1Out with the old, in with the new.  As we say goodbye to George Bush and his colorful, sometimes mangled communications, (can you say misunderestimated?) we usher in a new era of oratory.

We’re shifting to a new Communicator-in-Chief. What do I mean by this? A Communicator-in-Chief is a leader whose messages are so pragmatic, on point, and invigorating that his words spark immediate actions.  His/her messages unite, inspire and challenge others to reach their collective highest performance.  Communicators-in-Chief make things happen. President Bush was at the top of his game when, with a bullhorn to his lips and a firefighter at his hip,  he stood atop the rubble in New York City after 9/11 and rallied our country. Barack Obama promises to be an exceptional Communicator-in-Chief, which I’ll get to in a moment.

First, let’s focus on you. Are you a Communicator-in-Chief? You are if your  job depends upon making things happen through others. There are three habits you must master to reach your highest performance:

  1. You must connect engagingly. It’s essential to engage others straight away in today’s distraction-driven, short attention span world. People tune out quickly today. You’ll attract and earn people’s attention  by frontloading your communications with what’s truly relevant and matters most to them.
  2. You must convey clearly. We’re living in an information-overload society. Tossing too many facts and figures around is like adding empty junk food calories to your diet. Junk words dilute your message and lead to confusion, not clarity. You must make a conscious choice to pare down your words and deliver shorter, more visually stimulating messages if you want people to retain the information you share.
  3. You must convince specifically. It’s not the talk that matters, it’s the action.  It’s critical that you be ultra-specific about the step you want people to take.  Now is not the time for assumptions or vagueness. What, precisely, do you want others to do? Make your viewpoint or request utterly actionable because that’s the key to making things happen without delay in our busy world.

Develop these three habits and you’ll set in motion a transformative process to ensure that people listen to you, understand you, and take action.  (These are the principles in my forthcoming book, Talk Less, Say More, which will be in bookstores this fall.)

barack-obamaIncoming President-Elect Barack Obama has so far been an extraordinary Communicator-in-Chief which, ironically, his detractors hold against him. His critics call him “Mr. Podium.” They argue that he merely talks a good game.  I’m not buying that.  While I agree that blowhards are not true leaders, from what I’ve seen, Obama’s  no blowhard.  His words are based on visions that are implemented to unite and inspire action. Isn’t that the opposite of empty rhetoric? Far from merely talking a good game, if you communicate your visions effectively, action is the endgame.

Top Communicators-in-Chief also choose interactive formats to help others feel invested and make their messages people-powered.  In 2009, YouTube is the new fireside chat. LinkedIn is the new press release. Bloggers are the new reporters.  Tweeters are the new cheerleaders. Barack Obama’s team wisely used interactive tools to unite and invite voters to the polls.  Even better,  his incoming administration is promising to remake the stodgy White House website to invite citizens’ feedback.

What about you? Are you using the right tools to communicate your messages in the 21st century … or are you stuck in one-way, old-school memo style?  Your messages can trigger immediate feedback in the Age of Input which, if you’re smart, will supplement and improve your decision-making.

My challenge to you is this: develop your skills to inspire, unite, and  move others to action.  Choose a communication habit to improve (connect, convey, or convince) and write down 3 things you’ll start doing immediately to master the habit.  Take these steps, and you’ll be on your way to becoming an exceptional Communicator-in-Chief.

Yes, you can.

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Do You Share Credit or Hog It?

By Connie Dieken | Published: January 7, 2009

jett-travoltaNews reports throughout the weekend  referred to Jett Travolta as “the son of John Travolta” and called the boy’s death “The John Travolta Tragedy.”  The boy’s mother was an afterthought in the news reports, if she was even mentioned at all.

I realize this is the power of celebrity – John Travolta is a bigger star than his wife, and reporters habitually zero in on the most popular person. But it still struck me as shallow. Kelly Preston’s contributions and grief as the boy’s mother were minimized by small-minded reporting.

That’s why I was heartened when both stars’ websites released a carefully-crafted, heartfelt statement calling Jett “the most wonderful son that two parents could ever ask for.”  Did you catch that? Two parents. It was a subtle, but clear message to reporters that parents aren’t soloists, despite the fact that one partner may be more visible than the other.

What does this have to do with your leadership communication?  Everything. It’s very telling whether you have a pattern of sharing credit with others … or whether you hog the limelight for yourself, even inadvertently.

Successful leadership is a joint venture.  Always.  The very concept of leadership presupposes teamwork. It’s important that you don’t monopolize the credit, but share it with others generously. That you recognize, praise and reward others.

Study the most successful coaches in professional sports and you’ll see this principal in action.  Top coaches know that recognition motivates others to perform at their highest levels.  When teams win, coaches generously tell the world what a great job their players did. If they’re really savvy, their praise is specific. They don’t hog the credit. And when their teams lose, savvy coaches don’t duck. They face the flack, shoulder the responsibility and take the blame publicly.

As a leader, you must decide early on how you want to play this.  Will you share credit or hog it? Will you accept blame or point fingers?  The people on your team who help you achieve your goals will grow tired of never getting credit for their contributions.  They will grow disheartened, start grumbling and eventually, they will quit.

We all inherently want and need to be recognized for our contributions. If you don’t communicate your praise out loud, how are others to know that you’re grateful?

The wise person knows that acknowledging the contributions of others is key.  A true leader spreads praise and credit and, in return, is rewarded with loyalty.

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Leaders Who Can't Communicate…Aren't Leaders

By Connie Dieken | Published: December 29, 2008

phil-savage1Game over. Cleveland Browns owner Randy Lerner moved swiftly to fire his front office following the final, crushing loss of the season.  He cut general manager Phil Savage loose by phone after Sunday’s defeat, and then sacked coach Romeo Crennel the next morning.  Most Joes and pros alike support Lerner’s moves because the team under-performed in humiliating fashion this season.

What caused the under-performance?  The failure can be traced to the top. Browns insiders say Phil Savage lacked more than just scoreboard numbers. They say he was woefully deficient in communication and leadership skills.

I believe communication and leadership are joined at the hip. The leader is communicator-in-chief. And I don’t mean giving speeches. The first thing any leader delivers is culture. It’s the leaders responsibility to create a winning culture. The championship mindset begins with an open, clear communication path that cascades throughout the organization. Information must flow freely in both directions, with candor and clarity. Without this, organizations unravel and under-perform.

Savage’s leadership communication style smacked of rookie. He created distractions for the players and coaching staff and drew too much attention to himself. Two examples were a public spat with tight end Kellen Winslow over releasing information about team staph infections, and a profane e-mail exchange with a fan.

The Browns organization created a new playbook in how not to communicate. Faced with a leadership communication vacuum, bad habits prevailed as people jockeyed for position, covered their butts, withheld information, took pot shots, or became long-winded. Lacking direction, everyone freestyled their communication. Clearly, the results were disastrous.

This is not to say the dreadful season was all Savage’s fault.  The NFL is famous for its revolving door and zero job security. Players are paid to hit, hit, hit.  The front office is paid to replace, replace, replace. Stress levels are through the roof as everyone in the organization faces store-window scrutiny and is all too aware of the disposable nature of their job. It’s a challenge to motivate and inspire self confidence.

Here’s where it spiraled out of control:  Savage confused leadership with power. The two couldn’t be more different. Leadership means elevating others’ performances, making the whole greater than the sum of its parts.  Power, on the other hand, means “me, first.” It’s a narcissistic, alpha-male act that leads others to under-perform.  The quest for personal power destroys trust, triggering the team to be less than the sum of its parts.

Savage’s football skills led him to the job.  His lack of leadership communication tackled him from behind.

I believe this leadership meltdown is a forehead-slapping moment of clarity. It takes more than talent to reach the top of any profession. This is Randy Lerner’s chance to smack it through the middle of the uprights in Cleveland, to attain the level of success he’s enjoyed recently with his English soccer club.

It starts with hiring a leader who will make creating a winning culture his first priority.

Posted in Communication Skills, Leadership, Media Skills | Tagged , , , | 1 Comment