The world’s most famous athlete and a two-time presidential contender both torpedoed their careers with their self-destructive narcissism. Tiger Woods referred to his ego- maniacal state as a “sense of entitlement” in his televised mea culpa. John Edwards outed himself as a narcissist in an ABC interview after he was caught cheating on his cancer-stricken wife.

Perhaps there’s someone in your world who’s narcissistic. You may find it challenging to communicate with a person who’s grown accustomed to being puffed up by praise and attention. Surrounded by deferential people – their power walls adorned with plaques  – they’ve become bloated versions of themselves. How do you get your message across to a person with an inflated ego?

Let’s back up for a moment. You may not have put a label on their behavior, but here are a few clues to help you identify the egomaniac in your life. You can often peg a narcissist by their:

• grandiose sense of self-importance
• self-absorption
• sense of entitlement
• impulsiveness
• craving for excessive admiration
• preoccupation with power
• lack of empathy
• judgmental, critical nature
• belief that rules don’t apply to them
• intolerance to setbacks or slights
• explosive anger when frustrated

Know anyone like that? Let’s set aside their vanity (and their sexual vitality in the case of our two high-profile narcissists) and focus on their behavior towards YOU when they get frustrated. Ever been the target of a narcissist’s anger or condemnation? Their once-charming personality morphs into melt-down mode. They lob verbal grenades at you and howl at the moon. It’s painful to be on the receiving end of their demanding, demeaning behavior.

Here are 5 quick tips to help you communicate more effectively with a narcissist:

1. Give them options. Beneath their bluster, narcissistic people fear being left out of the loop. They crave control. It’s far better to offer them options to choose from, rather than feeding them ready-made decisions. They’ll tear other people’s decisions to shreds. Giving them options helps them feel respected and in control. It also prevents nasty hissy fits.
2. Focus on solutions, not problems. When you explain a problem or a challenge to a narcissist, direct attention to the solution. Don’t allow them to dissect the problem over and over again. Narcissists love drama and revel in the chaos. They’re easily agitated when frustrated. Define problems and present possible solutions, so they don’t smell blood in the water and tear you apart.
3. Make them the hero. Narcissists are preoccupied with power and truly believe they are special and unique. They live for attention and admiration. Want them to do something? Tell them how great they are at it and watch them perform. Better yet, praise their performance in front of others. Just keep it real, please.
4. Let them think it’s their idea. Narcissists often steal the credit for ideas that aren’t theirs. Why do they do that? Strangely, they truly believe that hijacked results are their own. Grabbing credit is a driving force for them. If this gets things done, I say learn to live with it. Over time, everyone will catch on – wink, wink. Meantime, graciously transferring credit for ideas to them makes things happen.
5. Manage their emotional blind spot. Egomaniacs lack empathy. They’re so caught up in their own world that it doesn’t occur to them to consider your feelings or viewpoints. It’s a huge blind spot. You must put your own feelings on the table if you choose to do so. Just be smart about sharing feelings with a narcissist. Brace yourself for the guilt trips and disparaging criticism that narcissists often dole out when others explain how they feel.

For those of you stuck in a tough relationship – either professionally or personally – I hope you’ll find these tips helpful and will pass them on to others who need them. I believe the key to communicating successfully with a narcissist is to smartly manage the relationship, not just cope with it.

So how did Tiger do once he finally stepped up to the tee to begin to make amends? Was it a good recovery shot? He handled some parts of the apology well, and others were lacking.

Bottom line:  the content was strong; his delivery was weak.

First, why the content was strong:

• He didn’t sidestep. He focused on the hot buttons: he cheated, he alone is to blame, he’s sorry for what he’s done, and he’s taking steps to ensure that it never happens again.

• He focused on the people he’d hurt.  He acknowledged that people had good reason to be critical of him. His target audiences for the apology were his wife and immediate family, his business partners and his fans. He was specific on how he’d let them down.

• He delivered a clear takeaway for the TV audience. “I’m so sorry for what I’ve done” came through loud and clear.

• He stated the solution. He shared exactly what he’s doing to try to make things right – that he’s been in rehab for the past 45 days and that he’s returning there to keep working on his issues. He also pointed that he’s returned to his faith after drifting away. He said that he’s working to ensure that he never repeats the mistakes that he’s made.

On the flip side, how did Tiger’s delivery hurt his ability to convince people of his sincerity?

• He appeared to speak from the head, not the heart. He read out loud from a prepared script.  Many people are slamming him for this today.  I am not among them.  Why? Tiger is not a dynamic personality – never has been, and probably never will be.  He needed to stick to his comfort zone of being prepared and methodical. It was crafted by a smart speechwriter – ad libbing was a risk that he wasn’t willing to take.
• He should have memorized the open and spoken it directly to the audience. When you’re stiff in your opening, it gives the impression that you’re insincere.  He would’ve been better served by frontloading a more heartfelt opening. I do give him credit for facing the camera lens directly when he delivered his “I’m sorry” messages and other issues where he showed true emotion about his wife and family, though he was equally adamant about not being a steroid cheater.

Perhaps the most remarkable statement was his admission of being a self-absorbed narcissist. “I never thought about who I was hurting.  I thought only about myself.  I thought I could get away with whatever I wanted to,” said Tiger.

I believe rehab is teaching Tiger that the  grandiose self-importance, sense of entitlement, and impulsiveness of narcissism has caused chaos and pain for everyone around him. Narcissists are so caught up in their own worlds and meeting their own impulsive needs, that the needs of others are simply not on their radar screens. Today’s admission of being self-absorbed, more than anything else he said, is what can change Tiger’s world.

To me, this is the communication lesson:  Tiger is a living, breathing example the danger of over-communicating with ourselves, and under-communicating with the others in our lives.  It’s critical to connect with others by listening for their needs and values. At the end of his prepared speech, Tiger said he’s now relying on others to help him change and become “a better man.” Good for him. If Tiger can conquer his narcissism, it will be a true story of redemption beyond the golf course.  Which gives hope for everyone out there who’s suffered with a narcissist in their life.

Did you read the headlines? “Jackson Kids Steal the Show!” the news articles proclaimed, calling the appearance of Michael Jackson’s two eldest children the most memorable moment of the 52nd annual Grammy Awards Show.

What does this have to do with communication skills, you ask? Everything. In a room filled with big egos, these two young people nailed the three things that you must do as a 21st century communicator: they got attention, got to the point, and got results – and so can you. These skills are crucial whether you’re presenting your ideas to big egos, big wallets, or big knuckleheads.

This post is not about Michael Jackson’s kids on stage.  Believe it or not, it’s about what you can learn from Michael’s approach to presentation skills that can transform and elevate your presentations forever. Turns out, Michael Jackson was not just a performer, he was the ultimate presenter. He was every bit as good or even better than the much-heralded Steve Jobs at presenting ideas that people respond to.

I was struck by what businesspeople can learn by watching the newly released video chronicling Michael’s stage preparations for his planned final shows in London, “This is It.” Here are 3 quick lessons:

1. The best presentations are built around your relationship with the audience

At the end of the film, you’ll see Michael and the crew gather in a large circle on stage. Director Kenny Ortega asks Michael to share a few words. Listen closely – what Michael says is the the stamp of a true presentation genius.  He tells the crew that a successful show is not based upon the dance moves, or the special effects, or even on him.  It’s a presenter’s relationship with the audience that matters most. Success is attained by the way you make people feel while they’re in your presence.  Lesson: don’t get caught up in worrying about yourself or your slides during a presentation. Zero in on your relationship with the audience.  Make their experience the king of the show and you’ll earn positive responses.

2. When you elevate others, everyone wins (including you)

Watch how Michael brings out the best in others. He stays gracious and kindhearted as he coaches the musicians, singers, and dancers during the rehearsals.  He’s 100% clear on what he wants from others, yet he doesn’t come across as all high and mighty or a taskmaster.  As a result, Michael Jackson draws the best possible performance out of everyone around him. Lesson: Stay relaxed, gracious, and humble at your presentations. Don’t let anxiety or pressure get the best of you. The most effective presenters are thoughtful, inspiring  leaders who play well in the sandbox.

3. Who’s the one communicator you should listen to most?

Why there were so many hours of rehearsal footage filmed prior to the concert run? Michael Jackson studied the “dailies.” He knew that he was in the connecting business, so he wanted to see how his “presentations” would come across to audiences from the stage, even before the seats were filled. Chances are you hate to see yourself on tape.  Heck, I avoided watching tapes of myself  during many years in the broadcast TV business.  But, ironically, as an executive coach I finally discovered the true power of videotaped assessments – they allow you to see the real you. As Michael Jackson clearly understood, there’s one communicator that you should listen to as much as possible – and that’s you. Study videotapes to hone your presentation’s content, your true voice, and your executive presence and you’ll earn a positive response from every audience.

I’ll tie this career-defining move to the CEO’s habitual Tilt-A-Whirl head movements (see the photo on the right from a different event) in a moment. First, let’s get your head straight on the essentials.

Rosenfeld is seeking to transform the world’s No. 2 food company into an even bigger global juggernaut – but some feel she hasn’t hit the sweet spot with this takeover attempt.

After Cadbury complained that her price was too low, she told investors that she planned to issue new stock to help pay for the purchase. Buffett, America’s most influential investor, responded with a public smackdown; a press release warning her not to sell stock or increase her price lest it destroy value for Kraft’s shareholders. Don’t spend too much, he urged, as he tried to rein her in.  She has until January 19 to make her final offer. Kraft shareholders will vote February 1 on whether to issue more stock. Cadbury stockholders will vote on February 2.

Now, in an effort to convince shareholders and save the deal, the 56-year old CEO is trying to placate both groups. Kraft has posted a video on its corporate website of Rosenfeld being interviewed by a British woman.

Her message in this video is influential but unfortunately, a distracting body language habit trumps the brilliant woman’s point of view. It’s a case of the eyes trump the ears. People must buy into the messenger before they buy into the message. Rosenfeld comes across as a human Tilt-A-Whirl, constantly tilting her head from side-to-side as she speaks.  Left-right-left-right-left-right.  In addition, in an apparent attempt to appear warm and likable, the CEO plasters on a smile throughout the interview, even when it’s not warranted.

Here are two quick presentation/media coaching tips to help you prevent undermining your executive presence with nervous body signals:

1. Avoid tilting your head. It looks coy and cute.  It’s not a powerful professional move unless you happen to work on the Las Vegas Strip. If that’s not your line of business, keep your head on straight.
2. Plastered-on smiles don’t cut it. Yes, you’ve heard many times that you should smile, and in most cases you should. But here’s the real truth about smiling: If your smile doesn’t come across as genuine, it can backfire on you. Make sure your smile is heartfelt.

People monitor you for the signals you send. Project a balance of likability and credibility to hit the sweet spot.  Don’t let nervous energy undermine your credibility.  To learn more about how your energy level is tied to your ability to influence others, read chapter 12 of my book, Talk Less, Say More.

The affiliates tag-teamed the network. But you can also credit your own thumb – the one that you use to change the channels on your remote control.

Turns out, your thumb is actually the biggest part of this story. Why? Because you tend to ease your death grip on the remote at 11 PM. Maybe it’s because your significant other has fallen asleep, maybe you’ve run out of juice for the day, or maybe it’s because you feel that all 11 PM newscasts are basically alike.  (News-Weather-Sports. Yadda-Yadda-Yadda.) Whatever your reason, the channel you land on at 10 PM tends to win your eyeballs for the 11PM News due to your suddenly lazy thumb.

Why is this so important? It’s simple, lopsided math. In contract negotiations during my years as a prime time anchor,  management revealed that late evening newscasts were responsible for up to 45% of the station’s advertising revenues. So in order to dial for dollars, we needed the network’s 10 PM programming to hand us a boatload of viewers who’d already put down their weapons for the night. (Of course, we hoped to attract you with our fetching hairstyles and sparkling news anchor personalities, but most of us knew better than that.)

So there you have it.  For the past four months, NBC has stuck its affiliates with rotten ratings leading into their Power Hour while it was saving tons of cash shunning costly scripted dramas.  In response, the affiliates produced their own drama worthy of the Internet Age.  Amid already-ravaged advertising revenue, they tag-teamed NBC and toppled the network with a “Stone Cold” Stunner.

Most of us resolve to shed extra pounds, get out of debt, or be more organized as we strive to reinvent ourselves in the New Year. But as the odometer turns over for 2010, what if we focus on a more professionally profound improvement?

Why not resolve to improve how people respond to you? Think of it as your New Year’s “Communi-lutions.” After all, interpersonal communication is radically different in today’s information-overload, distraction-driven decade, so isn’t it time to upgrade your ability to sell your ideas and lead effectively?

Here are my Top 10 Communi-utions to influence your world in the decade ahead:

1.Stop Informing, Start Influencing

The most important communication resolution you can make this year is to transform from being informational to influential. Stop data dumping like a linear play-by-play announcer. Instead, convert into the analyst – the color commentator. Your goal should be to shape people’s understanding and actions, not to dispense information.

2. Stay in Their Moment

Conquer today’s endless distractions by managing your own attention first. Resolve to be right here, right now when speaking with others. Focus on meeting their needs and values, instead of being caught up in your own concerns. Scan for signals and listen for values.

3. Frontload

Don’t bury the lead. People are impatient and overloaded today. Quickly nail your big idea and marry it to what’s most relevant to your listener.  People must grasp what’s in it for them – pronto – or they will tune you out. Frontloading your message is the antidote to rambling.

4. Use Goldilocks Candor

As a leader, you must get issues on the table in order to improve performance, so using the right level of candor is crucial. Think of it as a Goldilocks test: Not too hard, not too soft – it’s just right. Goldilocks candor prevents two common missteps: demoralizing and sugarcoating.

5. The Eyes Trump the Ears

Vision – the dominant sense – is a shortcut to clarity. Don’t create confusion with an avalanche of words. Use visuals instead of text whenever possible to help people analyze and understand new information, and integrate it quickly.

6. Talk in Triplets

Three is the world’s most powerful number because our minds crave information in multiples of three. If you want to ensure the clarity of a lengthy or complicated message, tap into the trilogy and use portion control by structuring your message around three key points.

7. Tell Stories

Stories have a longer shelf life than mind-numbing facts because they create mind pictures. Like a good movie, success stories and cautionary tales help others absorb, retain, and repeat your information and ideas.

8. Sound Decisive

Most people are surprised to learn that they don’t sound as decisive as they feel. Weak language and habitual hedging strip you of power. The language of leadership is decisiveness. It’s time to stop wavering and start firming up your communications.

9. Transfer Ownership

Let them own it and they’ll do it. People should feel as if they’re volunteering, not surrendering. A sense of self-discovery is often the difference between gaining commitment or compliance.   Shift your ideas and decisions to others so they will embrace them and act.

10. Adjust Your Energy

People constantly monitor you for the signals that you send.  Your vocal, facial, and body signals are crucial for a very powerful reason: reciprocity. People give back to you what you give to them. Most of us need an energy boost to balance likability and credibility, which generates commitment and action from others.

_________________________

onPoint Communication founder Connie Dieken transforms leaders into influential communicators. She’s the author of Talk Less, Say More, named a top business book for 2009.  A former Emmy Award-winning TV news anchor, Connie is an inductee of the Radio/Television Broadcasters Hall of Fame, winner of a Top 10 Women’s Business Owners Award, and an in-demand keynote speaker. You can reach her at Connie@StayOnPoint.com.

Instead, he got a reality check.

Why? We were on to him, suspicious of his communication style from the get-go. The circumstances leading up to the Jiffy Pop balloon escapade were telling:  the Wife Swap appearances.  The rant-filled video of the balloon release. The former colleagues calling Heene a narcissistic attention-seeker.

Dad got precisely the attention he didn’t want when his non-balloon boy opened his mouth on live TV. Falcon revealed what six year olds often do – the truth.  “You said we did it for the show,” he replied to dear old dad, talking too much.

Whoops. The family’s alibi just floated away.

So what does this have to do with you in the workplace?  Everything.  We’re living in a skeptical world.  Even when you try to convince others to buy into your ideas and decisions legitimately, people are suspicious they’re being duped. The more you talk, the less they believe. The new default status is to assume that people are pulling a fast one.

In my new book, Talk Less, Say More, I lay out the three habits you need to influence others  successfully in our demanding 21st century world. The 3 habits are to Connect-Convey-Convince^®.   Heene’s stunt soared through the first two habits by engaging and laying out a strong storyline, but his balloon popped as he attempted the third and trickiest habit, to convince.

First, let’s get clear about what I mean by convincing, which is very different from manipulating.  The difference is intent. Manipulators like Richard Heene focus on their own needs and theirs alone.  They’re determined to get their way, regardless of their impact on others.  They’ll steamroll, lie, or talk too much  in order to get what they want. Ultimately,  a manipulator’s story doesn’t ring true, so he/she fails to convince.

It’s a tremendous challenge to influence behaviors, decisions and actions in today’s skeptical world. Here are three strategies to help you convince honestly and successfully:

1. Sound decisive. Stop babbling and backpedaling.  Caught in a tangled web when his son outed him, Heene started backpedaling. He stalled as he tried to come up with an plausible answer as to why Falcon said, “we did it for the show.”  With the evidence mounting against him, dad’s balloon of confidence deflated.  He sidestepped by blaming the media, and he came across as deceptive.
2. Transfer ownership. You need peer power in order to convince others to buy in. That means you must shift your ideas and decisions to others so they’ll embrace them.  Did Heene have peers in his life who backed him up?  No.  One by one, former colleagues stepped forward to trash the guy. They essentially called him a media whore.  His peers weren’t convinced that he was telling the truth, so we weren’t either.
3. Adjust your energy. It’s critical to choose the right energy level for the situation.  Mom and pop Heene seemed to have hit the sweet spot for the 911 call and the ensuing police visit at the house.  The cops who monitored the family on lift-off day thought the Henne family got the verbal and body language right.  But they couldn’t sustain it.  Why? Energy feeds on itself. Once the Heene’s went off-script, they were done in.  Turns out the “amateur scientist” was also an amateur actor. Dad’s body language when young Falcon talked too much on CNN was a giant red flag.  Dad’s face, body and tone of voice changed drastically and revealed that he was lying.

Heene’s plan to land a reality gig crash landed, and not nearly as gently as the Jiffy Pop balloon in the newly-ploughed field.  Instead of facing reality TV cameras, Heene and his wife are now facing federal charges. Bottom line?  Convincing is not a thunderbolt event.  It’s not a once-and-done episode. It’s a sequence of events that unfolds incrementally, earning others’ trust and respect.  And that’s not hot air.

Here’s my quick summary of the brilliance and blind spots of David Letterman’s attempt to influence public opinion with the news of his sexual relationships and extortion plot, based on a sequence of 3 habits: Connect, Convey, Convince® from my new book, Talk Less, Say More:

Habit 1 – Connect
Definition:  Capture attention – give people what they want and value so they tune in to you.
This is where Letterman excelled because America is clearly engaged by his story. His brilliance at connecting was twofold.  1) He claimed home court advantage by getting out front and defining the story as an extortion case, instead of letting other media define it based primarily on the sexual affairs. 2) He stayed in his comfort zone by delivering the bad news on his own TV show, behind his familiar desk, in front of a devoted (if completely perplexed) audience.  Like most performers, the late night comic is more in command, at ease, and less anxious connecting in a studio than anywhere else.

Habit 2 – Convey
Definition: Manage information – get your points across with clarity, not confusion.
Letterman’s attempt to positively influence his audience came to a screeching halt at this step for two reasons. 1.) He withheld the salient details, so we’re all left scratching our heads wondering, “Who? When? Where?”  His failure to provide pertinent points has a creep factor to it. Some people are asking, “Isn’t that sexual harassment for the boss to have sex with his staff?” “When did this go on?” “Was he married at the time?” “Was it with interns?” He gave the story legs by not addressing these concerns.  Chances are, his lawyers admonished him to “Talk Less.” 2.) He confused the audience by mixing in jokes with his admission.  The audience couldn’t discern whether it was a joke or whether it was a serious matter, so they laughed inappropriately at times.   I do give Letterman credit, however, for specifically acknowledging that he had sex with women who work for him on the show. At least he didn’t pull a Clinton. He admitted to pulling down his World Wide Pants. (Ironic name for his company, isn’t it?)

Habit 3 – Convince
Definition:  Manage Action – win commitment and move people to act or believe now.
Letterman showed a gaping blind spot in his attempt to convince one audience, but he was powerfully effective at influencing a second audience, which was likely his primary concern.  Let’s look at them separately:

• Audience #1: The general public. Letterman failed to convince mainstream America that they should stay committed to him as a genial talk show host. He risked losing the trust of many Americans because he could now be seen as “that guy” – the serial cheater. He also comes across as a hypocrite for denouncing other mens’ affairs in his monologues.

• Audience #2: the Manhattan district attorney’s office. Letterman scored a home run with this audience.  He convinced the D.A. to set up a very quick sting, which lead to the arrest of a fellow CBS employee on charges of attempted grand larceny in the first degree. He got the district attorney’s office to commit to act on the extortion charge and they followed through beautifully.

How will this all play out? It depends upon many factors, including whether Letterman’s sexual partners come forward, what they reveal, whether his wife reacts publicly, and whether the alleged extortionist, “48 Hours” producer Joe Halderman, cops a plea or chooses to go to trial and unearth other facts in the case.

But in the court of early public opinion, winning a mixed judgment on a case as explosive as this is a blessing. Under the circumstances, the approach seems to have worked in Letterman’s favor.  At the very least, the talk show host was influential enough to put an alleged blackmailer in the hot seat right next to him.

Apologizing effectively can bolster your credibility and convince others to change their minds and take action.

Don’t toss around “I’m sorry” like a football on Thanksgiving Day.  Some people rush to retract big transgressions  merely to protect their backsides, which is perceived as insincere. Others over-apologize for small acts, dripping with contrition, which damages their credibility.  Both of these tactics are ineffective.  Like antibiotics, apologies become ineffective with misuse.

The trick is to understand the art of the apology and follow the right steps.  Here are some tips straight from page 124 of my new book, Talk Less, Say More, to generate goodwill with a contrite but classy apology:

• Don’t sidestep. If an issue embarrasses  you, you might instinctively avoid it in an effort to save face.  Instead, you’ll look insensitive.  A good, honest apology mends relationships and reputations.
• Hit the hot button. Focus specifically on the emotional hot button.  If you’re criticized for being irresponsible, for example, apologize for your lack of judgment.
• State the solution. If there’s a remedy to your transgression, share exactly how you’re going to make it right.  This will prevent future arrows from being slung at you.
• Focus on the recipient. An apology involves much more than a quick “Oops–sorry!” Make sure the recipient knows that you fully understand the impact of your transgression and that you won’t let it happen again.
• Don’t blame the victim. You’ll sound pompous and insincere.  Don’t begin with “If I offended anybody…” That sounds like you’re blaming a resentful person for being overly sensitive to remarks that you feel you obviously didn’t intend as an affront.  Instead, take responsibility.  Say something like, “I offended you and I’m sorry.“
• Time is of the essence. Apologize as soon as possible.  In today’s Internet age, you can’t wait for the Web to spread bad things before you express your contrition, or people will be convinced that you’re guilty and don’t care.
• Don’t inflict wounds. Likes like “No offense, but…” and “Don’t take this personally, but…” are passive-aggressive.  You’re saying one thing, but you mean the opposite.  What you’re about to say is personal and yes, it’s likely to offend.  So instead of qualifying it, be honest and get to the point kindly but decisively.

Let’s face it – we’re all human.  Which means that we’re all prone to messing up and hurting someone else’s feelings from time to time, even when we don’t intend to.  Hopefully your transgressions won’t be as huge or as public as the ones you’ve witnessed this week on Rude Tube.  The key to apologize effectively is to handle it directly,  sincerely, and as swiftly as possible.

1.Kayne West interrupts teenager Taylor Swift’s MTV acceptance speech by jumping on stage, grabbing her microphone, and dissing her selection.

2.Representative Joe Wilson of South Carolina interrupts the president’s address to a joint session of Congress on health care by yelling out “You Lie!”

Both outbursts were on live TV.  And both cases of Rude Tube won   goodwill for the target, not the heckler.

Many of you have asked me over the years during presentation skills coaching how to handle an incident like this if someone rudely interrupts you during a presentation or Q&A.

As you can now plainly see, the answer is simple and straightforward:

• Let the audience respond for you. Count on the fact that decent human beings will recognize bad behavior when they see it.  Good people are turned off by rudeness, and they will turn on the heckler.  The audience will automatically start pulling for you, even if they didn’t particularly support you before. They’re now in your corner, at least temporarily, so you’ll benefit from their goodwill.
• Move on and move away. Take a cue from targets Taylor Swift and Barack Obama.  Acknowledge, but don’t encourage.  How do you do this? Swiftly move on verbally, and move away from the heckler physically.  Don’t give the heckler what he/she craves: more attention.

Both of the high-profile hecklers, West and Wilson,  were quick to release public apologies. Why?  Peer pressure.  The attention they garnered wasn’t what they craved. Both thought they’d be backed up by their peers. Instead, West got booed off stage and Wilson got death stares. Both quickly backed off and apologized, hoping to save face and do damage control.

The fear that you’ll be embarrassed by a rude interrupter during a presentation is real. This fear of public speaking has kept some of you away from the spotlight altogether, sadly.  But now, I hope  you see that the greater risk is just the opposite.  It’s being that guy – the rude interrupter. The incivility of ranting and raving will damage the heckler far more than it could ever hurt  you.

So step up to the plate.  The audience is pulling for you – not the rude interrupter.