What Every Communicator Can Learn From … Michael Jackson

By Connie Dieken | Published: February 1, 2010

Did you read the headlines? “Jackson Kids Steal the Show!” the news articles proclaimed, calling the appearance of Michael Jackson’s two eldest children the most memorable moment of the 52nd annual Grammy Awards Show.

What does this have to do with communication skills, you ask? Everything. In a room filled with big egos, these two young people nailed the three things that you must do as a 21st century communicator: they got attention, got to the point, and got results – and so can you. These skills are crucial whether you’re presenting your ideas to big egos, big wallets, or big knuckleheads.

This post is not about Michael Jackson’s kids on stage.  Believe it or not, it’s about what you can learn from Michael’s approach to presentation skills that can transform and elevate your presentations forever. Turns out, Michael Jackson was not just a performer, he was the ultimate presenter. He was every bit as good or even better than the much-heralded Steve Jobs at presenting ideas that people respond to.

I was struck by what businesspeople can learn by watching the newly released video chronicling Michael’s stage preparations for his planned final shows in London, “This is It.” Here are 3 quick lessons:

1. The best presentations are built around your relationship with the audience

At the end of the film, you’ll see Michael and the crew gather in a large circle on stage. Director Kenny Ortega asks Michael to share a few words. Listen closely – what Michael says is the the stamp of a true presentation genius.  He tells the crew that a successful show is not based upon the dance moves, or the special effects, or even on him.  It’s a presenter’s relationship with the audience that matters most. Success is attained by the way you make people feel while they’re in your presence.  Lesson: don’t get caught up in worrying about yourself or your slides during a presentation. Zero in on your relationship with the audience.  Make their experience the king of the show and you’ll earn positive responses.

2. When you elevate others, everyone wins (including you)

Watch how Michael brings out the best in others. He stays gracious and kindhearted as he coaches the musicians, singers, and dancers during the rehearsals.  He’s 100% clear on what he wants from others, yet he doesn’t come across as all high and mighty or a taskmaster.  As a result, Michael Jackson draws the best possible performance out of everyone around him. Lesson: Stay relaxed, gracious, and humble at your presentations. Don’t let anxiety or pressure get the best of you. The most effective presenters are thoughtful, inspiring  leaders who play well in the sandbox.

3. Who’s the one communicator you should listen to most?

Why there were so many hours of rehearsal footage filmed prior to the concert run? Michael Jackson studied the “dailies.” He knew that he was in the connecting business, so he wanted to see how his “presentations” would come across to audiences from the stage, even before the seats were filled. Chances are you hate to see yourself on tape.  Heck, I avoided watching tapes of myself  during many years in the broadcast TV business.  But, ironically, as an executive coach I finally discovered the true power of videotaped assessments – they allow you to see the real you. As Michael Jackson clearly understood, there’s one communicator that you should listen to as much as possible – and that’s you. Study videotapes to hone your presentation’s content, your true voice, and your executive presence and you’ll earn a positive response from every audience.

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Did This CEO Hit the Sweet Spot?

By Connie Dieken | Published: January 17, 2010

Kraft Chairman and CEO Irene Rosenfeld is scrambling to persuade shareholders that her company’s $17 billion bid to buy British candymaker Cadbury is good for both companies. Her pursuit has drawn poor reactions from both Cadbury’s shareholders and Kraft’s biggest shareholder, Warren Buffett.

I’ll tie this career-defining move to the CEO’s habitual Tilt-A-Whirl head movements (see the photo on the right from a different event) in a moment. First, let’s get your head straight on the essentials.

Rosenfeld is seeking to transform the world’s No. 2 food company into an even bigger global juggernaut – but some feel she hasn’t hit the sweet spot with this takeover attempt.

After Cadbury complained that her price was too low, she told investors that she planned to issue new stock to help pay for the purchase. Buffett, America’s most influential investor, responded with a public smackdown; a press release warning her not to sell stock or increase her price lest it destroy value for Kraft’s shareholders. Don’t spend too much, he urged, as he tried to rein her in.  She has until January 19 to make her final offer. Kraft shareholders will vote February 1 on whether to issue more stock. Cadbury stockholders will vote on February 2.

Now, in an effort to convince shareholders and save the deal, the 56-year old CEO is trying to placate both groups. Kraft has posted a video on its corporate website of Rosenfeld being interviewed by a British woman.

Her message in this video is influential but unfortunately, a distracting body language habit trumps the brilliant woman’s point of view. It’s a case of the eyes trump the ears. People must buy into the messenger before they buy into the message. Rosenfeld comes across as a human Tilt-A-Whirl, constantly tilting her head from side-to-side as she speaks.  Left-right-left-right-left-right.  In addition, in an apparent attempt to appear warm and likable, the CEO plasters on a smile throughout the interview, even when it’s not warranted.

Here are two quick presentation/media coaching tips to help you prevent undermining your executive presence with nervous body signals:

  1. Avoid tilting your head. It looks coy and cute.  It’s not a powerful professional move unless you happen to work on the Las Vegas Strip. If that’s not your line of business, keep your head on straight.
  2. Plastered-on smiles don’t cut it. Yes, you’ve heard many times that you should smile, and in most cases you should. But here’s the real truth about smiling: If your smile doesn’t come across as genuine, it can backfire on you. Make sure your smile is heartfelt.

People monitor you for the signals you send. Project a balance of likability and credibility to hit the sweet spot.  Don’t let nervous energy undermine your credibility.  To learn more about how your energy level is tied to your ability to influence others, read chapter 12 of my book, Talk Less, Say More.

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The “Stone Cold” SmackDown at NBC

By Connie Dieken | Published: January 11, 2010

I spent many years anchoring the late news for an NBC-owned station, so I’m keenly aware of why general managers at NBC affiliates across America banded together, morphed into “Stone Cold” Steve Austin, and wrestled the network to the ground. They’d had it up to HERE with The Jay Leno Show experiment strangling their revenue streams, so they let loose with a SmackDown after four months.

The affiliates tag-teamed the network. But you can also credit your own thumb – the one that you use to change the channels on your remote control.

Turns out, your thumb is actually the biggest part of this story. Why? Because you tend to ease your death grip on the remote at 11 PM. Maybe it’s because your significant other has fallen asleep, maybe you’ve run out of juice for the day, or maybe it’s because you feel that all 11 PM newscasts are basically alike.  (News-Weather-Sports. Yadda-Yadda-Yadda.) Whatever your reason, the channel you land on at 10 PM tends to win your eyeballs for the 11PM News due to your suddenly lazy thumb.

Why is this so important? It’s simple, lopsided math. In contract negotiations during my years as a prime time anchor,  management revealed that late evening newscasts were responsible for up to 45% of the station’s advertising revenues. So in order to dial for dollars, we needed the network’s 10 PM programming to hand us a boatload of viewers who’d already put down their weapons for the night. (Of course, we hoped to attract you with our fetching hairstyles and sparkling news anchor personalities, but most of us knew better than that.)

So there you have it.  For the past four months, NBC has stuck its affiliates with rotten ratings leading into their Power Hour while it was saving tons of cash shunning costly scripted dramas.  In response, the affiliates produced their own drama worthy of the Internet Age.  Amid already-ravaged advertising revenue, they tag-teamed NBC and toppled the network with a “Stone Cold” Stunner.

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10 Radically Different Resolutions for 2010

By Connie Dieken | Published: January 5, 2010

Top 10 Communi-lutions to Improve How People Respond to You In Our Distraction-Driven Decade


Most of us resolve to shed extra pounds, get out of debt, or be more organized as we strive to reinvent ourselves in the New Year. But as the odometer turns over for 2010, what if we focus on a more professionally profound improvement?

Why not resolve to improve how people respond to you? Think of it as your New Year’s “Communi-lutions.” After all, interpersonal communication is radically different in today’s information-overload, distraction-driven decade, so isn’t it time to upgrade your ability to sell your ideas and lead effectively?

Here are my Top 10 Communi-utions to influence your world in the decade ahead:

1.Stop Informing, Start Influencing

The most important communication resolution you can make this year is to transform from being informational to influential. Stop data dumping like a linear play-by-play announcer. Instead, convert into the analyst – the color commentator. Your goal should be to shape people’s understanding and actions, not to dispense information.

2. Stay in Their Moment

Conquer today’s endless distractions by managing your own attention first. Resolve to be right here, right now when speaking with others. Focus on meeting their needs and values, instead of being caught up in your own concerns. Scan for signals and listen for values.

3. Frontload

Don’t bury the lead. People are impatient and overloaded today. Quickly nail your big idea and marry it to what’s most relevant to your listener.  People must grasp what’s in it for them – pronto – or they will tune you out. Frontloading your message is the antidote to rambling.

4. Use Goldilocks Candor

As a leader, you must get issues on the table in order to improve performance, so using the right level of candor is crucial. Think of it as a Goldilocks test: Not too hard, not too soft – it’s just right. Goldilocks candor prevents two common missteps: demoralizing and sugarcoating.

5. The Eyes Trump the Ears

Vision – the dominant sense – is a shortcut to clarity. Don’t create confusion with an avalanche of words. Use visuals instead of text whenever possible to help people analyze and understand new information, and integrate it quickly.

6. Talk in Triplets

Three is the world’s most powerful number because our minds crave information in multiples of three. If you want to ensure the clarity of a lengthy or complicated message, tap into the trilogy and use portion control by structuring your message around three key points.

7. Tell Stories

Stories have a longer shelf life than mind-numbing facts because they create mind pictures. Like a good movie, success stories and cautionary tales help others absorb, retain, and repeat your information and ideas.

8. Sound Decisive

Most people are surprised to learn that they don’t sound as decisive as they feel. Weak language and habitual hedging strip you of power. The language of leadership is decisiveness. It’s time to stop wavering and start firming up your communications.

9. Transfer Ownership

Let them own it and they’ll do it. People should feel as if they’re volunteering, not surrendering. A sense of self-discovery is often the difference between gaining commitment or compliance.   Shift your ideas and decisions to others so they will embrace them and act.

10. Adjust Your Energy

People constantly monitor you for the signals that you send.  Your vocal, facial, and body signals are crucial for a very powerful reason: reciprocity. People give back to you what you give to them. Most of us need an energy boost to balance likability and credibility, which generates commitment and action from others.

_________________________

onPoint Communication founder Connie Dieken transforms leaders into influential communicators. She’s the author of Talk Less, Say More, named a top business book for 2009.  A former Emmy Award-winning TV news anchor, Connie is an inductee of the Radio/Television Broadcasters Hall of Fame, winner of a Top 10 Women’s Business Owners Award, and an in-demand keynote speaker. You can reach her at Connie@StayOnPoint.com.

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Did Balloon Boy Take You for a Ride?

By Connie Dieken | Published: October 18, 2009

Balloon boy matrixThe balloon boy’s dad, Richard Heene, thought he’d convinced America that his eccentric family should have its own reality show.

Instead, he got a reality check.

Why? We were on to him, suspicious of his communication style from the get-go. The circumstances leading up to the Jiffy Pop balloon escapade were telling:  the Wife Swap appearances.  The rant-filled video of the balloon release. The former colleagues calling Heene a narcissistic attention-seeker.

Dad got precisely the attention he didn’t want when his non-balloon boy opened his mouth on live TV. Falcon revealed what six year olds often do – the truth.  “You said we did it for the show,” he replied to dear old dad, talking too much.

Whoops. The family’s alibi just floated away.

So what does this have to do with you in the workplace?  Everything.  We’re living in a skeptical world.  Even when you try to convince others to buy into your ideas and decisions legitimately, people are suspicious they’re being duped. The more you talk, the less they believe. The new default status is to assume that people are pulling a fast one.

In my new book, Talk Less, Say More, I lay out the three habits you need to influence others  successfully in our demanding 21st century world. The 3 habits are to Connect-Convey-Convince®.   Heene’s stunt soared through the first two habits by engaging and laying out a strong storyline, but his balloon popped as he attempted the third and trickiest habit, to convince.

First, let’s get clear about what I mean by convincing, which is very different from manipulating.  The difference is intent. Manipulators like Richard Heene focus on their own needs and theirs alone.  They’re determined to get their way, regardless of their impact on others.  They’ll steamroll, lie, or talk too much  in order to get what they want. Ultimately,  a manipulator’s story doesn’t ring true, so he/she fails to convince.

It’s a tremendous challenge to influence behaviors, decisions and actions in today’s skeptical world. Here are three strategies to help you convince honestly and successfully:

  1. Sound decisive. Stop babbling and backpedaling.  Caught in a tangled web when his son outed him, Heene started backpedaling. He stalled as he tried to come up with an plausible answer as to why Falcon said, “we did it for the show.”  With the evidence mounting against him, dad’s balloon of confidence deflated.  He sidestepped by blaming the media, and he came across as deceptive.
  2. Transfer ownership. You need peer power in order to convince others to buy in. That means you must shift your ideas and decisions to others so they’ll embrace them.  Did Heene have peers in his life who backed him up?  No.  One by one, former colleagues stepped forward to trash the guy. They essentially called him a media whore.  His peers weren’t convinced that he was telling the truth, so we weren’t either.
  3. Adjust your energy. It’s critical to choose the right energy level for the situation.  Mom and pop Heene seemed to have hit the sweet spot for the 911 call and the ensuing police visit at the house.  The cops who monitored the family on lift-off day thought the Henne family got the verbal and body language right.  But they couldn’t sustain it.  Why? Energy feeds on itself. Once the Heene’s went off-script, they were done in.  Turns out the “amateur scientist” was also an amateur actor. Dad’s body language when young Falcon talked too much on CNN was a giant red flag.  Dad’s face, body and tone of voice changed drastically and revealed that he was lying.

Heene’s plan to land a reality gig crash landed, and not nearly as gently as the Jiffy Pop balloon in the newly-ploughed field.  Instead of facing reality TV cameras, Heene and his wife are now facing federal charges. Bottom line?  Convincing is not a thunderbolt event.  It’s not a once-and-done episode. It’s a sequence of events that unfolds incrementally, earning others’ trust and respect.  And that’s not hot air.

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Did Letterman Communicate Effectively to Influence the Public?

By Connie Dieken | Published: October 3, 2009

LettermanHow you communicate a message has a direct impact on your ability to influence opinions.

Here’s my quick summary of the brilliance and blind spots of David Letterman’s attempt to influence public opinion with the news of his sexual relationships and extortion plot, based on a sequence of 3 habits: Connect, Convey, Convince® from my new book, Talk Less, Say More:

Habit 1 – Connect
Definition:  Capture attention – give people what they want and value so they tune in to you.
This is where Letterman excelled because America is clearly engaged by his story. His brilliance at connecting was twofold.  1) He claimed home court advantage by getting out front and defining the story as an extortion case, instead of letting other media define it based primarily on the sexual affairs. 2) He stayed in his comfort zone by delivering the bad news on his own TV show, behind his familiar desk, in front of a devoted (if completely perplexed) audience.  Like most performers, the late night comic is more in command, at ease, and less anxious connecting in a studio than anywhere else.

Habit 2 – Convey
Definition: Manage information – get your points across with clarity, not confusion.
Letterman’s attempt to positively influence his audience came to a screeching halt at this step for two reasons. 1.) He withheld the salient details, so we’re all left scratching our heads wondering, “Who? When? Where?”  His failure to provide pertinent points has a creep factor to it. Some people are asking, “Isn’t that sexual harassment for the boss to have sex with his staff?” “When did this go on?” “Was he married at the time?” “Was it with interns?” He gave the story legs by not addressing these concerns.  Chances are, his lawyers admonished him to “Talk Less.” 2.) He confused the audience by mixing in jokes with his admission.  The audience couldn’t discern whether it was a joke or whether it was a serious matter, so they laughed inappropriately at times.   I do give Letterman credit, however, for specifically acknowledging that he had sex with women who work for him on the show. At least he didn’t pull a Clinton. He admitted to pulling down his World Wide Pants. (Ironic name for his company, isn’t it?)

Habit 3 – Convince
Definition:  Manage Action – win commitment and move people to act or believe now.
Letterman showed a gaping blind spot in his attempt to convince one audience, but he was powerfully effective at influencing a second audience, which was likely his primary concern.  Let’s look at them separately:

  • Audience #1: The general public. Letterman failed to convince mainstream America that they should stay committed to him as a genial talk show host. He risked losing the trust of many Americans because he could now be seen as “that guy” – the serial cheater. He also comes across as a hypocrite for denouncing other mens’ affairs in his monologues.
  • Audience #2: the Manhattan district attorney’s office. Letterman scored a home run with this audience.  He convinced the D.A. to set up a very quick sting, which lead to the arrest of a fellow CBS employee on charges of attempted grand larceny in the first degree. He got the district attorney’s office to commit to act on the extortion charge and they followed through beautifully.

How will this all play out? It depends upon many factors, including whether Letterman’s sexual partners come forward, what they reveal, whether his wife reacts publicly, and whether the alleged extortionist, “48 Hours” producer Joe Halderman, cops a plea or chooses to go to trial and unearth other facts in the case.

But in the court of early public opinion, winning a mixed judgment on a case as explosive as this is a blessing. Under the circumstances, the approach seems to have worked in Letterman’s favor.  At the very least, the talk show host was influential enough to put an alleged blackmailer in the hot seat right next to him.

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How to Apologize Effectively

By Connie Dieken | Published: September 15, 2009

Kayne West-Jay LenoThere sure are a lot of high profile apologies floating around this week – Kayne West, Serena Williams, Rep. Joe Wilson. Which brings me to you.

Apologizing effectively can bolster your credibility and convince others to change their minds and take action.

Don’t toss around “I’m sorry” like a football on Thanksgiving Day.  Some people rush to retract big transgressions  merely to protect their backsides, which is perceived as insincere. Others over-apologize for small acts, dripping with contrition, which damages their credibility.  Both of these tactics are ineffective.  Like antibiotics, apologies become ineffective with misuse.

The trick is to understand the art of the apology and follow the right steps.  Here are some tips straight from page 124 of my new book, Talk Less, Say More, to generate goodwill with a contrite but classy apology:

  • Don’t sidestep. If an issue embarrasses  you, you might instinctively avoid it in an effort to save face.  Instead, you’ll look insensitive.  A good, honest apology mends relationships and reputations.
  • Hit the hot button. Focus specifically on the emotional hot button.  If you’re criticized for being irresponsible, for example, apologize for your lack of judgment.
  • State the solution. If there’s a remedy to your transgression, share exactly how you’re going to make it right.  This will prevent future arrows from being slung at you.
  • Focus on the recipient. An apology involves much more than a quick “Oops–sorry!” Make sure the recipient knows that you fully understand the impact of your transgression and that you won’t let it happen again.
  • Don’t blame the victim. You’ll sound pompous and insincere.  Don’t begin with “If I offended anybody…” That sounds like you’re blaming a resentful person for being overly sensitive to remarks that you feel you obviously didn’t intend as an affront.  Instead, take responsibility.  Say something like, “I offended you and I’m sorry.“
  • Time is of the essence. Apologize as soon as possible.  In today’s Internet age, you can’t wait for the Web to spread bad things before you express your contrition, or people will be convinced that you’re guilty and don’t care.
  • Don’t inflict wounds. Likes like “No offense, but…” and “Don’t take this personally, but…” are passive-aggressive.  You’re saying one thing, but you mean the opposite.  What you’re about to say is personal and yes, it’s likely to offend.  So instead of qualifying it, be honest and get to the point kindly but decisively.

Let’s face it – we’re all human.  Which means that we’re all prone to messing up and hurting someone else’s feelings from time to time, even when we don’t intend to.  Hopefully your transgressions won’t be as huge or as public as the ones you’ve witnessed this week on Rude Tube.  The key to apologize effectively is to handle it directly,  sincerely, and as swiftly as possible.

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Rude Tube: Public Speaking Interruptions

By Connie Dieken | Published: September 14, 2009

What a week for high profile heckling.  Let’s recap:taylor-swift-kanye-west

1.Kayne West interrupts teenager Taylor Swift’s MTV acceptance speech by jumping on stage, grabbing her microphone, and dissing her selection.

2.Representative Joe Wilson of South Carolina interrupts the president’s address to a joint session of Congress on health care by yelling out “You Lie!”

joe.wilson.heckling.gi

Both outbursts were on live TV.  And both cases of Rude Tube won   goodwill for the target, not the heckler.

Many of you have asked me over the years during presentation skills coaching how to handle an incident like this if someone rudely interrupts you during a presentation or Q&A.

As you can now plainly see, the answer is simple and straightforward:

  • Let the audience respond for you. Count on the fact that decent human beings will recognize bad behavior when they see it.  Good people are turned off by rudeness, and they will turn on the heckler.  The audience will automatically start pulling for you, even if they didn’t particularly support you before. They’re now in your corner, at least temporarily, so you’ll benefit from their goodwill.
  • Move on and move away. Take a cue from targets Taylor Swift and Barack Obama.  Acknowledge, but don’t encourage.  How do you do this? Swiftly move on verbally, and move away from the heckler physically.  Don’t give the heckler what he/she craves: more attention.

Both of the high-profile hecklers, West and Wilson,  were quick to release public apologies. Why?  Peer pressure.  The attention they garnered wasn’t what they craved. Both thought they’d be backed up by their peers. Instead, West got booed off stage and Wilson got death stares. Both quickly backed off and apologized, hoping to save face and do damage control.

The fear that you’ll be embarrassed by a rude interrupter during a presentation is real. This fear of public speaking has kept some of you away from the spotlight altogether, sadly.  But now, I hope  you see that the greater risk is just the opposite.  It’s being that guy – the rude interrupter. The incivility of ranting and raving will damage the heckler far more than it could ever hurt  you.

So step up to the plate.  The audience is pulling for you – not the rude interrupter.

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How to Hijack Your Own Influence during Q&A

By Connie Dieken | Published: July 29, 2009

You’ve been leading a high priority mission for months.  You’ve pushed. Prodded. You’ve influenced internally because you believe it’s the most vital issue facing your organization. Your team has invested sweat equity and they’re counting on you to make it happen publicly.

At last, it’s time to present your idea to an audience and influence others to take action.  So what happens when you finally stand before your audience and take your swing at bat?

You get hijacked during Q&A.

obama-health-presser-2It happened to the President of the United States on his home turf last week. At the end of his prime time health care news conference, Barack Obama answered a hot button question that was totally off-topic.  Instead of asking about health care, a reporter asked the president what he thought of the confrontation between Harvard scholar Henry Louis Gates and Cambridge police officer James Crowley. The president weighed in with his opinion on race relations, ending with the tantalizing words “acted stupidly.”

Bingo! Home run for the reporter! She’d successfully hijacked a presidential press conference. If this was a game of chess, she’d just pulled a capture: removing the opponent’s piece or pawn from the board by taking it with one’s own. The president’s health care headline was toast. Now, the headlines were commandeered to scream of the 3 P’s: the president, the professor and the police.

This is a living, breathing reminder to all of us to be mindful of Q&A so that our message doesn’t become part of an opportunistic takeover – friendly or hostile.

Here are a few tips to help ensure that you don’t hijack your own influence during Q&A:

  • Don’t answer too quickly. If the question is off-topic and hot button, don’t allow yourself to be hijacked.  Gently but firmly respond that the question is important but it’s off-topic and will be best addressed during a more appropriate occasion. Offer a specific time when you will provide a thoughtful answer.  The key is that you shouldn’t appear to be dodging the question. You’re simply deferring it to a more appropriate time and place.
  • Keep your answer brief. The more you talk, the more likely you are to get caught up in your underwear and say something you’ll regret. Long answers often lead to an unfortunate choice of words (think “acted stupidly”) that can bite you in the backside. Talk less, but say more.
  • Bridge back to your key points.  The purpose of your presentation is to influence your audience and drive them to action.  Never forget that.  Use the audience’s questions to reinforce your key points, not to steer the boat in a completely different direction.
  • Don’t let Q&A be the final word. Always have two closings.  1) The one that ends your prepared remarks before Q&A, and 2) the one that wraps everything up after Q&A.  End with power and a strength of conviction that your message is high priority and actionable.
  • Plan for hot topic tie-ins. You shouldn’t be surprised in today’s “anything goes” society.  Think current events.  What’s on people’s minds? Prepare, prepare, prepare.

As a communication coach, I guide senior executives in their high-profile presentations. As the day of their presentation draws near, I shift our focus from delivery of their key messages to preparation for high stakes Q&A.   I ask every  relevant question that I believe their audience might ask to ensure that the executive is influential in driving the ball forward, not backwards. Then, I slip on my broadcaster’s  cap and link their topic to other hot-button topics. This is an eye-opening exercise for executives who tell me it  has saved them from embarrassment, being at a loss for words, saying something they’d later regret, and a loss of leadership influence. It boosts their confidence to handle anything that comes their way.

My inner Girl Scout constantly whispers the motto “Be prepared” in my ear.  Never has that been more essential than in today’s loosey-goosey world of Q&A.

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The Less is More Lesson

By Connie Dieken | Published: June 27, 2009

mark-sanfordYou heard about the married politician caught trysting with his girlfriend in Argentina. On the day he was caught returning from his fun in the sun, South Carolina Governor Mark Sanford held a hasty, free association press conference at the statehouse to drop the bomb.

Three words for you, Governor Sanford:  Less is more.

His rambling admission of guilt was devastatingly wordy and bizarre.  He dithered on about his love of hiking.  He blathered about “sparking” with his “dear, dear friend” in Buenos Aires.  At last, he meandered into a confession.  After finally admitting to philandering, the governor presented his priorities wrong.  He tearfully apologized for hurting his girlfriend before he expressed regret that his shameful behavior had damaged his wife and sons, and that he’d done the citizens of South Carolina wrong during his six-day disappearing act.

The governor showed us how not to meet the press.

As a leader, Sanford’s wordy discourse was far too long and misdirected.  He needed to talk less and say more.

I hope you’ll never experience a moment of truth quite like this one in your career.  However, as a leader you will be called upon to influence the thoughts and actions of others.  Here are a few tips to help you influence intentionally:

  • Don’t confuse talking with influencing. Most leaders think influence means showing up and giving a speech.  They want to look good, sound intelligent, and come across as well as possible.  However, the real goal of  influence is to move people to commit to action. That means touching hearts and minds, not merely talking your way out of (or into) something.
  • Don’t shoot for a quick fix. It’s not the short game that matters – it’s the long game. The Governor will learn this over the coming months as he’s judged by his constituents, citizens and family.  A hastily arranged  press conference (or meeting) solves nothing.  When attendees are caught off guard,  they can’t fully process the information you dump on them, which means that you’ve merely delayed the final outcome.
  • Move people in the direction you desire. Communicate with purpose.  Not just because you believe that a communication of some sorts is called for.  The Governor was too quick on the trigger to address the media.  His goal should have been to get the story out of the news, not to get tongues wagging and create even more drama.
  • Cut the distractions. Did you see the young faces behind the governor as he spoke?  They were smiling broadly as he choked up.  How weird.  Be aware of your surroundings during leadership communications – or make sure that someone else is watching out for you.
  • Keep it brief and simple. The key to communication in the 21st century is brevity.  Attention spans are collapsing. Demands on time are increasing. Master the complex business of simplicity. If you blather on, you risk losing people’s attention…and their respect.

Sanford’s Wall Street wife was far more succinct.  Her statements to the press have been pithy, if  a bit understandably passive-aggressive. So far, she’s winning the oh-so-polite war of words for public support.

Leadership communication is about aligning people to influence their thoughts and actions. I encourage you to be purposeful about communicating with influence.  Take time to distill your message instead of being long-winded.  In today’s world, saying less is truly more.

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